Catch a Gideon

Don’t Keep Score - Ch 2 of Never Eat Alone - Part 1 of 2

March 12th, 2007 by digerati

This is Chapter 2 of the Never Eat Alone series at Catch a Gideon. Points from Mr. Ferrazzi are in bold. I’m asking that you react to the quotes through comments. Share you reaction to each as well as your experiences in college and the real world. (Yeah that’s right, network dammit!)
Until you become as willing to ask for help as you are to give it you are only working half the equation.

In the first chapter we talked about how networking is about finding out what you can do for other people. Networking also means creating longer term relationships that benefit both people. You can’t always give, and you can’t always receive; and frankly, after high school people are rarely interested in asking if you need help. If you need help with something it’s your job to go ask for it.

This isn’t to say you need to beg people to fix your problems. Quite the contrary. Needing help may mean that you need an accountant for a new startup. You need to seek out the people who can help you. Just telling your friends about your startup will not solve your problem.

If you can create a good solid network, being open with your problems and shortcomings will only serve to strengthen your relationships.

Where employees once found generosity and loyalty in the companies we worked for, today we must find them in a web of our own relationships.

I can’t comment on this from personal experience. As someone who is just entering the corporate workforce I have no experience with what companies used to be like. I can say that I feel no loyalty to any company I might work for (outside of my own or small ventures). That is a downside for both employees and employers. Employees have to work harder to manage their retirements, their careers, and their relationships. Employers have a higher risk of losing good people whereas in the past they could promote them when something became available.
He thought of relationships as finite, like a pie that can only be cut into so many pieces. Take a piece away and there was that much less for him. I knew, however, that relationships are more like muscles, the more you work them, the stonger they become.

This quote refers to someone Mr. Ferrazzi tried to get to help one of his proteges. The person selfishly refused saying they needed the favor from their connection and so wouldn’t help someone starting out.

There are two ways to look at this. If you don’t talk to people often enough, they will forget you and drop out of your network. You do not want to call too often asking for them to do something either. The relationship needs to be give and take. Today you may call asking if they have openings for interns (your protege perhaps) and tomorrow you may call to discuss a new opportunity they may like to get involved in.

The point being that you can take too much from a relationship, but if that relationship is balanced then you don’t need to worry about overusing it.

———-

Never Eat Alone is one of the best networking books written, period. Buy it now and follow along as Catch a Gideon goes through each chapter of the book.

Bookmark to: